Long Distance Relationships.
I’ve never really been in one, but I already know they suck. From friends who have attempted and succeeded and friends who have attempted and failed. Its not an easy adventure.
I’m about to know first hand how “fun” it is, because I just got the news this week, Matthew is heading to the midwest. Its amazing how quickly I turned from being slightly sad but proud of him, to being downright angry. Why do I have to be left behind? Why do I need to feel the stretch while he goes home and hangs with his friends? Why do I have to figure out what happens when its time for a move? It seems garshdarn unfair!
Like most people who have to justify to themselves why they are upset by staring at themselves in the mirror while crying and saying one line over and over that makes you feel better,
I took to the web with gusto and immediately looked to see if I were the only one who felt an array of emotions towards an impending LDR. Fortunately, I am not alone. When you look online, there are tons of articles dealing with those who took anger out on their partner, felt anger towards their partner, and listing it as something to be aware of. The only thing that made me feel a little better is that LDR’s are things that are increasing in America. They say its based off of an economy where people feel a need to hold on to their jobs more, they also relate it to college couples who begin in one place but their careers take them away.
Ok, so more people are doing it. That makes me feel…a tiny bit better? But not really. Just because everyone is doing something, doesn’t mean its good. I find that there are a decent amount of sites dedicated purely to LDR’s, like this one and this one. I’ve perused the site and while there are definitely super cute things in there, I still stand by the belief that relationships can’t work out if he’s not there to hug you and she’s not there to kiss you. Whatev!
So of course, to ease my worries, I need to hear cold hard facts. Low and behold (is that how that saying is spelled?) there was actually an entire center dedicated to the studying of LDR’s!
They share some of their statistics which show that in comparison to couples who live close to one another (Proximal Relationships), only 8% of LDR’s breakup during the first year. BUT, 27% breakup during the first month! Goshers! So if I make it past the first month, I have a better chance? The best statistic I read in here though, says that in 2005, 1 in 10 marriages had a period of long distance during their courtship. Whew! Even though that’s only 10%, that still sounds like a whole lot of people, which makes me feel about 23% better.
When it comes down to it, my LDR will be tough. According to AskMen.com, its going to take setting an end goal, setting up times to talk, being more trustworthy and making romance new and creative. This sounds…like…a ton…of work, but I guess I’ll do it if I gotta. It’ll be rough! I’m a needy, whiny, spoiled little brat. I will want to be on the phone all the time unless I’m too busy, but I’ll expect him to text me even if I can’t respond. I will probably make snide remarks when I feel like he’s having too much fun without me. I’ll be hell in heels when I’m PMSing, and unwilling to share when he’s in town to visit. But I know that hearing his voice will make me feel better, that I’m proud of his new job, and that each visit will mean so much. I’ll stick it out because, well, I love the guy. Based off our many conversations about the future:
“Matthew, will you cheat on me?” “Nope”
“Ok, well will you visit each month?” “Yep”
“Do you think we’ll be good?” “Course”
I think we might be up for the challenge.
Gosh, I hope I didn’t just jinx it!
Mew, ’cause i like to feel Special: